I was fully tuned into the sermon until the Pastor said: “Some of us are too fragile for God’s glory…We think being “chosen” or “called” is equivalent to receiving special privileges.”
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After some time, the members began to recognize me as Marcus’ wife. However, no one really knew me because I remained cordial, but not engaging.
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God, you said a lot of things that week to not have given me any specific details. Why do you have to be so elusive? Do you want me to follow your perfect will or not? If so, then just tell me what you want me to do!
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Although my fears were legitimate, I knew I couldn’t allow them to have more influence than the Spirit working through me.
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I’m not looking for a fight, I’m not running from one either.
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Christmas didn’t go as planned…Why? Superman tested positive for COVID-19.
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We’re willing to give multiple chances to everyone and everything else but the first time God doesn’t do as expected, we give up on Him.
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January 1, 2020, Superman and I found out I was pregnant. Given our previous experiences, I was cautiously excited but very surprised.
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“As I began studying, I kept hearing, “Accept What God Allows.” I didn’t like it. I wanted to make the congregation dance and run around the building! I didn’t want to come off as insensitive, I wanted them to like me.”
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Sometimes the anxiety is so great, so consuming, so palpable, I’d rather not continue to pursue purpose if it would eliminate the anxiety altogether.
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